So many of us have been in abusive or unhealthy friendships and relationships. We give them everything we have. Our time, our money, our efforts, our thoughts, our hearts.
They let us down, but we give them more chances. They use us, but we stay. And eventually, they walk away.
Some stay because they think things will eventually get better. Others think that they’ll be able to change the person. Regardless of the reason, it rarely gets better by staying.
When Diana was about to leave home in Wonder Woman, her mom warned her “Be careful in the world of men, Diana, they do not deserve you.” It struck a chord and I thought of all of the people who didn’t deserve me. The people who ask me for help on school assignments, but never return the favor. The people who only want to hang out when it’s fun, but are never there when I need them. The people who wanted me to keep them company, so they can enjoy their time here before they move away. They keep taking, and I keep giving because I have hope that they’ll someday do the same for me. Because we’re friends right?
You eventually reach a point lower than rock bottom and realize that the only way for things to get better is for you to leave. Know your self worth and know that you don’t deserve to be treated like this. You deserve better.
Relationships are a two way street and there should be an equal amount of love and respect for one another. If there is a significant difference in the amount of effort or time you’re putting into a relationship. If you’re always the one reaching out to initiate conversations. If you’re always the one trying to make plans. If you’re always the one making time for them, it’s probably time to assess your situation and see if it’s worth continuing. The most difficult thing about this is that you’re leaving behind a friend or a significant other. You’re leaving behind memories. You’re leaving your comfort zone.
Not all positive change feels positive in the beginning, but it takes time to see how much you’ve grown and how much you learned. The first step is for you to have courage and be the change you wish to see in your world.