It took a trip where I couldn’t literally breathe (and post yoga talks and a This is Us episode) for me to realize the need to relinquish some control and figuratively breathe.

Because there isn’t another person to regularly turn to for consultation, I’ve been living my best life enjoying the complete freedom of being the sole decider on what to do and where to go. Weekend plans and trip itineraries tend to happen how I envision them because I plan ahead and have an idea of how things will occur.

The week before Boston, I stayed up late and was extremely stressed about my midterm exams and caught a cold. Moving around required more effort than usual due to the weight of my pea coat coupled with cold symptoms. I had a moment of clarity during the grogginess while sitting on the orange line train, and The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck finally clicked for me.

We had another thing or two that I wanted to do before heading home for the night, but it wasn’t going to be possible. At the time, I had no extra energy to expend on getting worked up about it. I was exhausted and figured we still had time before we flew home. Had I had the energy that day, I realized that not completely sight-seeing checklist might have bothered me. But why should I let something so trivial bother me when it was going to be alright later down the road? It wasn’t worth worrying about because there were more significant things to direct that energy towards. Pick your battles and use your limited time and energy to focus on what matters.

During one yoga practice, our instructor suggested setting our intention to be one of “nonattachment” and moving through practice without any expectations. She went on to explain how this concept can be applied to life. When we try to control every little thing that happens to us and worry about the outcomes, we forget to be present and enjoy the moment. It’s okay to live in the unknown and just have faith that things will work out. Things are going to happen that we can’t control, so we should try to be open to everything that comes our way.

What made me understand that change was necessary was Randall’s wedding toast in This Is Us:

There’s absolutely no point in trying to control the future cause no one knows where we’ll be, but what we can control are the people we choose.

Choosing our people is the closest we come to controlling our destiny.

Because while everything else may change, if you choose right, your people will stay the same.

So let us be open to change. Let us welcome the unexpected. Let us choose those who choose us.

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